The next biggest app? Monkey

I was on YouTube recently (well I’m on there everyday )

But recently I came across a video with someone using the Monkey app and I saw that there were other videos to with lots of views concern people using this app. The youtubers obviously have some crazy thing they do with it

I wonder why I haven’t heard of it before until now. I feel it’s an interesting concept . There a sort of thrill or like it’s kind of scary for me meeting someone like in couple Of second of being presented with their name and age. But it can exciting -who know who you’ll meet hopefully not someone bad but then of course that’s why you use safety precautions and you can always not add time to the video. But there is also an option to add someone as a friend probably important if you want to chat with them again as the app randomly pairs you with another person. who knows If you might see them again on there ?

Well any whose I thought this could be interesting.Maybe even for people who are shy. With the click of button you can video chat with someone for a limited time. One of the users can add more time to the video chat.

I think about how this is could be like tinder for video. I’m not sure if any real relationships have taken place from this but it reminds me of speed dating.

Ok here’s the thing though. I haven’t actually gone all the way in the sense that I’ve installed the app and am a user but I have yet to accept a video chat.

Am I ready for this? I think it could be a way to make possible new friends and also be like speed dating.

Fyi, since this is a video chat make sure you don’t leave something in view of the camera whereby you reveal personal information like where you live or your credit card number.

If you do a google search yes there are people worried about how bad people can use this app for wrong.

Apparently on YouTube Someone warned about how easy it is to lie about your age on it. I myself did not but it was obvious some people did as I saw about two or three people with ages at around 166 and yeah nobody on earth is that old. The good thing though is I’m 31 and it pretty much paired me with people it seems mostly around my age aka not teens or very young people.

Also apparently there is a feature where you can like blur your face so if you’re not that ready yet you could do that.. or you could have the camera face a wall and talk but yeah that would probably be annoying.

I mean eventually I hope to actually do it . I will probably start with blurring my face …


How do they do it?

I was checking out other vocalists on Fiverr and when I listen to my vocals it doesn’t sound as good, and don’t get me wrong it’s not like I can’t carry a tune but wow.


These singers ( I mostly heard female singers)  are really great on Fiverr. I was intending to list a gig for singing a song  but its like I’m wondering if it’s a plug in they use or mic or maybe my novice music production skills  (and lack of great recording space) that my voice doesn’t sound as polished as theirs does.

..maybe I really just could stand to learn to sing in a polished way…:/ ..

These singers are really good



Nevertheless, different people like different things and may think my voice suits their song. But the fact of the matter is people can discern and would like nice a polished product.  Even, if people may not understand what makes a quality vocal track they can hear it. I’ve got to learn how they do that sing better with a mic

or maybe it’s the vocal production I need to work on more. If you know how I can get better at vocal recording and vocal production please share you advice. Thanks

Do you like her?

Why do I keep saying  that?

It’s like in my heart that question  arises when I think of people I respect or admire or want to have some kind of relationship with ( probably mostly famous people) . I spend so much time preoccupied with lives of famous people on social media..


I guess people know…

You think by not saying anything and keeping things to yourself people won’t know…
But people can pick up stuff. I guess it’s all in our nature, (well most of us) to pick up things about people that they don’t disclose openly.
I remember this guy I was talking to via onlin  picked up  things about me that are a bit shameful for me to reveal.
One of them he revealed in a question- Have you been on any dates?
I was thirty or 29 at that time. I guess something I emanated, showed or displayed clued him in that I may have never been on a date before.
To make matters worse a girl at my previous job asked me if I had a boyfriend or have I ever had a boyfriend ( I don’t remember exactly ) but I was uncomfortable and didn’t want to answer the question, so I dodged it. I said something assertive not letting her know.
I guess perhaps, I should’ve owned it and but been like cool about it chill about it. But wouldn’t that only be authentic to do if had willfully chosen to remain single all these years? I didn’t necessarily want or think by my age I would have never been on date. I have unfortunately been a late bloomer in more than one aspect. This being one of them.  The stage I am now is what people were going through in their teens in young adult years.. trying to find out who you are and what you want to in your life. I ‘m wanting break free..


What am I going to do


with my hair?

Right now it is natural ( like 4c hair), but damaged. due to not regularly moisturizing or attending to it  to due other things  vying for my attention and concern.

Right now it’s either straighten it,  which I kind of want to do ( likely with a relaxer ..maybe natural one? or salon).

However, I feel like I was give like a mini vision, like a word of knowledge ( maybe from the Holy Spirit) that to me was advice that I should do a certain kind of dreads.  But inside I can barely fathom doing that… One reason, I do not want to do that is due to the fact that once you get them although it is possible to undread it is very difficult to do so, plus I like having the option available to do more than one kind of hairstyle that may not include dreads.  Mainly,  I really have penchant to at just have smooth hair tied down with one band. I’m not sure what I was shown is accurate.  Obviously I could try doing dread but I just don’t see how I could want them.

One of the reasons Im really getting serious about doing something with my hair is that at my age I guess I have to think about possibly meeting a spouse , my hair needs to be on point so that I’m free to at least post pictures online without fear. Maybe God willing , someone might care to know me more if they saw a good picture of me online.  Also for endeavors I might pursue professionally.  Also this may also have to do with my self-esteem.

Fact is, I want to keep my hair looking neat and presentable, and  for it not to me be so hard or so much energy to maintain it that way.  Regularly maintaining my natural 4b or 4c  hair hasn’t been something I’ve  done well.   For more than ten years I’ve been in this state and my hair has not grown . I’ve failed to really give it the care and attention it would need to be nourished and grow..and I’m just tired I guess of the style. For sometime now I constantly wear a wigs. Why am I scared..

Any advice? I need discernment.  I guess I need to stand on the promises in the Bible concerning His guidance in my life and soak on that.



So I quit my job


( this was like from draft I wrote soon after quitting  about two weeks ago)

Life got really crazy and I came to a brinking point. I had already weighed reasons for staying and reasons to leave.and by far the reasons to leave not only were more, but  a big reason for leaving was that it simply was not sustainable for me.  I don’t like or care for the job, and perhaps the way my mind is (I’m a bit meticulous)  being overly cautious about details can really slow a person down.

Anyway also learning point was: as time passed it became clearer and clearer to quit.

Now although I am not at that job, the fact of the matter i  I still have a bit of fear. So the concerns have changed from the effects of my work at this job to looking for how I can get income. I only saved some money and I really need to get another source of income. So unfortunately I’ve been applying to jobs in areas I don’t want to (biology). I mean I’ve heard the phrase:

“Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to do.”― Oprah Winfrey

but like is that really wise? I guess it depends on the situation. Say you want to be doctor well unfortunately the ride to that may be rough but because you want it, you’re willing to do it.

Recently I learned from this video that I need to love the process  so basically whatever it is that you want perhaps you need to find a way to like the “getting there”  part.  I watched a video on guys that learned piano on their own, and they way one did it was by learning songs he liked. Who knows how many people have given up on learning instruments because they were trying to learn it in a way that was not enjoyable.  By the way, one thing I don’t like about Gary Vee self awareness concept  is it could discourage some people into thinking they can’t be something( Ive felt that way..) They might think they are weak in an area or not fit for it when one thing it really could be is that they are inexperienced ,so  they lack confidence…  I guess ( and maybe Gary Vee has explained his concept of self awareness more clearly or in depth )  one should really try out something they’d like to do for a substantial amount of time to be able to judge if it’s something they’d want to do for a living.

Anyway back to the idea of me applying to jobs I don’t care for.  I guess I hate being a “wage slave”  but I do have school loan debt so basically it’s like a requirement for to seek have a full time job for a deferment or forbearance ( I forgot the details exactly).

So basically I’m just trying to figure out what to do now. I  thought about doing the Master’s of Music in Music Production, but it might be overkill for me. On the flip side, by the end of a year would have in a sense “mastered ” music production , but it comes as a cost, I would incur debt and I already have enough debt to buy a house (that’s another story for another time as to why I got into so much debt for majors I care little about). Also I don’t care to produce music for other artists but to make music and songs of my own. Plus again I don’t care to work for other artists so finding a job in the “music industry”  doesn’t appeal to me. Now yes I  can learn it on your own, yeah I  know. the issue is that I have not been great at self discipline, plus I have only like “finished ” one song this year. It is near the end of July.  I think being perfectionist , impatience and indecisive sare part of the reason why. I want to learn to produce, mix an master my  song/music.

Another option is an online course in graphic communication, since I’m in-state it would be cheaper. It might only be ~10,000-15,000  extra ( I already have a bachelors).  With this, maybe I could get a  “Regular ” job ( something to “fall back ” on). However , I may not be as passionate about this as I am about making my own songs  and or making music videos.

I’ve felt pressure to  be honorable and being able to provide for myself financially is respectable. Pursuing mastering music production  is not considered respectful but dumb to many. I mean well if you do end up being able to make living for yourself on it than ok, but as you are pursuing it and have not arrived there will be doubters and I guess there’s pressure to not be  a deadbeat…

An MS in music production, as far as I’m concerned is not a great degree for getting a job based on what Ive read online.

A BS in graphic communication perhaps I could get a job, but will it pay a lot?  not for entry level. Plus, I do not want to feel like a slave working, but perhaps maybe I could get a job hat doesn’t feel like slavery.

I guess at the end of the day if I don’t want to be a wage slave I need to work hard and wisely for self employment. But that may take a while to pull off and I really hate the idea of doing a biology job. So I may just consider to that BS in graphic communication …

By the way someone told me that I liked djing better than music production, I don’t see how that can be true tbh I don’t know if I care about djing. Perhaps though if I got more familiar with it I could..

In addition, I could dj to get some money…:/

Pray for wisdom



Working on your ideas

So I really get obsessed with wanting to do things right and look perfect as concerning art…Like  with music production, I want to learn  everything there is or at least get an overview, a read through before doing something, delving into and working on a song. I guess I want to feel prepared,

abstract-background-beach-634548I mean it does help. I can’t lie but after you get I get at least a basic knowledge, shouldn’t I work on the ideas I’ve already been given and have. I think I have enough knowledge to carry them out.. .I can learn almost much working to carry out these goals. That’s one thing that can really help me now is practicing.